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New Release Calender
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With the boom-ping-ping, listen to the ill shit that I bring bring…
It’s the PR Roundup!
- -Hundies is releasing the first in a series of transsexual titles featuring chicks with dicks boning other chicks. This is an underserved niche in the market, as most tranny titles involve trannies and dudes. One can only wonder how porn drama queen Christian will react if suddenly trannies turn to predominantly fucking trannies instead of dudes like him. It’s interesting to note that the females in this title are all Brazilian. Don’t expect to see many North American porn stars fucking trannies anytime soon, as it usually means they’ll get less work on the straight side because of disease worries. And all of this underscores my vow to NEVER travel to Brazil. Apparently, that country is just crawling with shemales. Not that I have anything against shemales, I think Chyna is a great person. Oh what? …she’s a chick?
- -Venom is planning to do a parody of I Dream Of Jeannie. Dude, that’s a freaking great idea…a parody of an old sitcom! C’mon…when’s someone gonna do a porn parody of Airwolf or Alf?
- -Hustler is releasing Barely Legal Interactive. Hustler’s last interactive title InTERActive was the fuckin’ shit man, I’ve never seen another studio’s interactive titles even begin to touch it. Interactive titles should be more than just “choose an angle”, “choose a position” stuff. And man…with Blu Ray technology we should be able to make some amazingly interactive titles, provided we (the adult industry) actually put some effort into it.
- -Nasstoys has hired a new Home Party Marketing Representative with years of experience in the home party market. Sarah Mack, not to be confused with former Cleveland Browns running back Kevin Mack, will bring her many years experience to Nasstoys, placing the novelty studio at the head of the home party market. I hear she narrowly beat out 2 other guys for the job, apparently they had some experience in house parties as well.
- -Pink Visual has went into a product placement deal with OhMiBod sex toys. In a related note, Amazing Ty has went into a product placement deal with Brunswick bowling pins for all her upcoming “huge object inserted in vagina” scenes. Steeeeeerike!
- -Smash Pictures is releasing Teen Idol 6 on November 13th. The movie features teen girls showcasing their talents, which range from sucking cock, to strokin cock, to taking cock in vag to taking cum on body. Not a single juggler amongst them…who says America’s Got Talent? Tight teens shot in hi-def, that’s all you need to know.
Well, we’ve come to the end of our little column. I hope you find this to be the funniest column in the history of mankind. “Mankind.” That word should have new meaning for all of us today. We can’t be consumed by our petty Press Releases anymore. We will be united in our common interests. Perhaps it’s fate that today is Wednesday, and you will once again be fighting for our freedom by slanging porno…and should we win the day, Wednesday will no longer be known as the day after Tuesday, but as the day the world declared in one voice: “We will not go quietly into the night!” We will not vanish without a fight! We’re going to live on! We’re going to survive! We’re going to jerk off! Today we celebrate - Wednesday!
Don’t forget to add PornNewz on Myspace, send us that PR and adult studios would be wise to advertise with us for online and in print editions. Got a comment for me…email me and tell me whatcha think! If you like the PR Roundup, make sure you’ve read ‘em all! ShamWOW!
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